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22–36 monthsSelf-Regulation

Can inhibit own actions/behaviours, e.g. stop themselves from doing something they shouldn’t do.

Observe whether the child: can inhibit own actions/behaviours, e.g. stop themselves from doing something they shouldn’t do.

What it looks like

Three ways this behaviour shows up as a child grows. Each level includes everyday moments to watch for.

Emerging

Just starting

Shows a brief pause when cued and can stop with immediate adult prompting, but often restarts the behaviour quickly.

What you might see

  • Reaches for a forbidden object immediately after being told “no,” even while looking at the adult.
  • Keeps climbing/throwing despite repeated “stop” until an adult physically blocks or removes them.
  • Hits/grabs in the moment of frustration without pausing to consider another response.
  • Freezes when an adult says “stop,” then continues the behaviour seconds later.
  • Pulls hand back after a “no,” but hovers and tries again unless closely supervised.
  • Stops only when an adult moves closer or repeats the instruction several times.

Expected

On track

Can stop themselves in simple, familiar situations after one or two reminders, especially when given a clear alternative action.

What you might see

  • Stops mid-reach when reminded and chooses a different toy when offered an alternative.
  • Waits at a doorway briefly after being asked to “stop and wait,” needing a second prompt to hold.
  • Uses a simple self-cue (shakes head, says “no”) while stepping back from a boundary.

Exceeding

Going further

Usually inhibits actions after a single cue across everyday contexts, and can redirect into a safer/acceptable behaviour.

What you might see

  • Stops an unsafe action after one cue (e.g., “stop running”) and switches to walking.
  • Asks “can I?” or waits for permission instead of immediately grabbing a restricted item.
  • When upset, holds back from hitting and uses a calmer action (moves away, seeks adult, squeezes hands).
  • Remembers a rule before acting (e.g., stops at the curb without being told).
  • Stops themselves and explains why (e.g., “hot,” “not safe,” “not for throwing”).
  • Reminds a peer of a boundary (e.g., “stop, that’s not for climbing”) while keeping their own behaviour controlled.

Try this at home

Small everyday moments where you can notice this behaviour without setting up anything special.

  • Play a “freeze/stop-go” game (music on/off) and notice whether your child can stop their body when the cue changes.

  • At the door/curb (in a safe spot), ask “stop and wait” and observe whether your child can pause before moving forward.

  • During play with a tempting off-limits item visible (kept safe), notice whether your child can refrain after you say “not for touching.”

  • During snack, place a treat down and say “wait… now” and watch whether your child can hold back until the release word.

  • When your child is frustrated, notice whether they can stop themselves from hitting/grabbing if you prompt “hands down” or “stop.”

Connected behaviours

Behaviours that scaffold, follow, or co-emerge with this one.

Where this comes from

The framework source and supporting developmental research.

Framework source

  • Development Matters in the EYFS (2012), DfE — Personal, Social and Emotional Development: Managing feelings and behaviour (22–36 months).

    Framework-native indicators include growing behavioural control and stopping oneself from doing something not allowed.

Developmental research

  • Diamond, A. (2013). Executive functions. Annual Review of Psychology, 64, 135–168. doi:10.1146/annurev-psych-113011-143750

    Executive-function research identifies inhibitory control as a core component of self-regulation and behavioural control.

Five-level rubric (detailed)Show

The full progression underlying the three levels above. Used by the platform’s reasoning agent when planning activities and observations.

Not Yet
Acts impulsively and continues a prohibited action despite hearing “stop/no,” requiring adult physical intervention to prevent it.
  • Reaches for a forbidden object immediately after being told “no,” even while looking at the adult.
  • Keeps climbing/throwing despite repeated “stop” until an adult physically blocks or removes them.
  • Hits/grabs in the moment of frustration without pausing to consider another response.
Emerging
Shows a brief pause when cued and can stop with immediate adult prompting, but often restarts the behaviour quickly.
  • Freezes when an adult says “stop,” then continues the behaviour seconds later.
  • Pulls hand back after a “no,” but hovers and tries again unless closely supervised.
  • Stops only when an adult moves closer or repeats the instruction several times.
Developing
Can stop themselves in simple, familiar situations after one or two reminders, especially when given a clear alternative action.
  • Stops mid-reach when reminded and chooses a different toy when offered an alternative.
  • Waits at a doorway briefly after being asked to “stop and wait,” needing a second prompt to hold.
  • Uses a simple self-cue (shakes head, says “no”) while stepping back from a boundary.
Secure
Usually inhibits actions after a single cue across everyday contexts, and can redirect into a safer/acceptable behaviour.
  • Stops an unsafe action after one cue (e.g., “stop running”) and switches to walking.
  • Asks “can I?” or waits for permission instead of immediately grabbing a restricted item.
  • When upset, holds back from hitting and uses a calmer action (moves away, seeks adult, squeezes hands).
Reflexive
Inhibits actions proactively by recalling rules before acting, and may remind peers about safety or agreed boundaries.
  • Remembers a rule before acting (e.g., stops at the curb without being told).
  • Stops themselves and explains why (e.g., “hot,” “not safe,” “not for throwing”).
  • Reminds a peer of a boundary (e.g., “stop, that’s not for climbing”) while keeping their own behaviour controlled.