expresses feelings and needs during familiar peer or adult interactions
Observe whether the child: expresses feelings and needs during familiar peer or adult interactions.
What it looks like
Three ways this behaviour shows up as a child grows. Each level includes everyday moments to watch for.
Emerging
Just starting
The first sign is brief: a request, movement, mark, pause, or offer that points toward feelings and trusted support.
What you might see
When a turn is delayed, the child frowns, says one word, and accepts a timer.
The child lets an adult offer two choices and reaches for one.
The child holds a comfort object after a noisy moment and stays nearby while settling.
Expected
On track
In familiar activity, the child handles a feeling, preference, or need with a purposeful choice, word, gesture, movement, or material action. Another person can see why it matters.
What you might see
The child chooses the quiet cushion after covering ears during a loud song.
The child names disappointment and accepts a plan for a later turn.
The child tells a peer “I’m still using it” and waits beside the adult for support.
Exceeding
Going further
In a more complex moment, the child combines the focus with planning, care for others, or explanation. Follow-through remains visible.
What you might see
The child tells an adult what support would help during a difficult transition.
The child suggests a repair, such as giving back the toy and trying a different role.
The child notices frustration early, takes space, and comes back with a calmer voice.
Try this at home
Small everyday moments where you can notice this behaviour without setting up anything special.
Offer quiet cushion for a real purpose and wait before helping. Pay attention to how a feeling, preference, or need shapes the next step.
After the first attempt, ask one open question and then go quiet; see whether the child revises, demonstrates, or continues.
Where this comes from
The dataset source and any supporting developmental research.
Ministry of Education. (2017). Te Whāriki: He whāriki mātauranga mō ngā mokopuna o Aotearoa: Early childhood curriculum.
The bicultural early childhood curriculum of Aotearoa New Zealand. Te Tāhuhu o te Mātauranga (NZ Ministry of Education), 2017 revision.