22–36 monthsManaging SelfPersonal, Social and Emotional Development: Self-confidence and self-awareness
Clearly communicates their need for potty or toilet.
Observe whether the child: clearly communicates their need for potty or toilet.
What it looks like
Three ways this behaviour shows up as a child grows. Each level includes everyday moments to watch for.
Emerging
Just starting
Shows some signals (e.g., fidgeting, hiding, holding self) but rarely communicates clearly enough to act in time. May say a word after the fact or when asked directly.
What you might see
Wets/soils without any noticeable attempt to tell an adult (no approach, no words, no gestures).
Becomes distressed after an accident but cannot indicate the reason beyond crying.
Pulls at nappy/clothes but does not connect it to going to the potty/toilet when offered.
Hides behind furniture or goes still and fidgets but does not tell an adult until prompted.
Says “wee/poo” only after the nappy/pants are already wet/soiled.
Points to the bathroom/potty only when an adult asks, not spontaneously.
Expected
On track
Communicates need for potty/toilet with a consistent word/sign/gesture in familiar settings, sometimes in time to get there. May still need reminders and adult help with timing or urgency.
What you might see
Says a consistent cue (e.g., “wee,” “potty,” “toilet”) and heads toward the bathroom with an adult.
Interrupts play to tell an adult, but sometimes it’s very urgent and there may be a small accident.
Uses a gesture (tapping nappy/crotch, pulling adult’s hand) that reliably indicates toileting need.
Exceeding
Going further
Clearly tells an adult they need the potty/toilet in time across daily routines and settings. Can ask even when busy playing and will persist (repeat/come find an adult) until supported.
What you might see
Clearly tells an adult in time, then waits (briefly) while the adult prepares/opens the bathroom.
Repeats the request if not heard and seeks a different adult rather than giving up.
Communicates need even in a new place (relative’s house/public toilet) with the usual word/sign.
Says they need the toilet before leaving the house or before a car journey without being asked.
Uses different phrases depending on context (e.g., “I need the toilet” / “I need a wee”) and is understood by unfamiliar carers.
Notices early body cues (e.g., stops, says they need to go) rather than only at the last moment.
Try this at home
Small everyday moments where you can notice this behaviour without setting up anything special.
Transition: Before going out, ask “Do you need the potty/toilet?” Notice whether your child can answer clearly and/or initiates the request themselves.
Playtime: When your child is deeply engaged in play, watch whether they can pause and tell you they need the potty/toilet rather than having an accident.
Mealtime: After drinks, notice whether your child communicates toileting need (word/gesture) in time, especially when seated at the table.
Bedtime routine: During bath/pyjamas, notice whether your child can tell you they need the toilet rather than only showing discomfort.
Out-and-about: In a less familiar place, observe whether your child can still communicate the need clearly to you or another trusted adult.
Connected behaviours
Behaviours that scaffold, follow, or co-emerge with this one.
The framework source and supporting developmental research.
Framework source
Development Matters in the EYFS (2012) — Physical Development: Health and self-care (22–36 months).
Framework-native statement capturing the observable shift from adult-led care routines to child communication and participation.
Five-level rubric (detailed)ShowHide
The full progression underlying the three levels above. Used by the platform’s reasoning agent when planning activities and observations.
Not Yet
Does not signal toileting needs in a way adults can understand, and wet/soiled nappies are usually only noticed by adults. May resist or not connect sensations with using the potty/toilet.
Wets/soils without any noticeable attempt to tell an adult (no approach, no words, no gestures).
Becomes distressed after an accident but cannot indicate the reason beyond crying.
Pulls at nappy/clothes but does not connect it to going to the potty/toilet when offered.
Emerging
Shows some signals (e.g., fidgeting, hiding, holding self) but rarely communicates clearly enough to act in time. May say a word after the fact or when asked directly.
Hides behind furniture or goes still and fidgets but does not tell an adult until prompted.
Says “wee/poo” only after the nappy/pants are already wet/soiled.
Points to the bathroom/potty only when an adult asks, not spontaneously.
Developing
Communicates need for potty/toilet with a consistent word/sign/gesture in familiar settings, sometimes in time to get there. May still need reminders and adult help with timing or urgency.
Says a consistent cue (e.g., “wee,” “potty,” “toilet”) and heads toward the bathroom with an adult.
Interrupts play to tell an adult, but sometimes it’s very urgent and there may be a small accident.
Uses a gesture (tapping nappy/crotch, pulling adult’s hand) that reliably indicates toileting need.
Secure
Clearly tells an adult they need the potty/toilet in time across daily routines and settings. Can ask even when busy playing and will persist (repeat/come find an adult) until supported.
Clearly tells an adult in time, then waits (briefly) while the adult prepares/opens the bathroom.
Repeats the request if not heard and seeks a different adult rather than giving up.
Communicates need even in a new place (relative’s house/public toilet) with the usual word/sign.
Reflexive
Anticipates and communicates toileting needs proactively (e.g., before leaving the house/starting a long activity) and can use varied communication (words, context) with unfamiliar adults when appropriate.
Says they need the toilet before leaving the house or before a car journey without being asked.
Uses different phrases depending on context (e.g., “I need the toilet” / “I need a wee”) and is understood by unfamiliar carers.
Notices early body cues (e.g., stops, says they need to go) rather than only at the last moment.
