The Pretend Tea Party Rules

What you'll need

Set up a simple pretend tea party or snack time with 2-3 cups, a plate, and optional stuffed animal guest. Floor or small table.

How it works

1. 1~20s

   Start by pouring pretend tea -- or putting a cracker on a plate -- and offering it to your child. Say something like 'here you go!' in a friendly way. Now here's what I want you to notice: does your child take it? And then, try asking your child to give you one. 'Can I have some too?' Does they share with you?

   Watch for: shares_or_offers_items_when_asked

2. 2~20s

   Now let's see about taking turns. If you're pouring pretend tea, pour some for your child, then pour some for yourself, then ask your child to pour some for the bear or for you. Does they understand the idea of 'your turn, my turn'?

   Watch for: participates_in_turn_taking_sequence

3. 3~20s

   Here's a sneaky one. Pretend to spill some tea -- tip the cup over and say 'oops!' in a light, not-upset way. Watch what your child does. Does they react? Try to help clean up? Laugh? Just watch? And after your reaction, try tipping your child's cup over gently and see if they tries to wipe it or fix it.

   Watch for: responds_to_minor_norm_violation

4. 4~15s

   Now try using some polite words in the game. When you give your child something, say 'here you go!' and then wait a beat. If your child has any polite words -- 'ta,' 'please,' 'thank you,' even a gesture like nodding -- see if they come out. You can also model by saying 'thank you' when your child gives you something.

   Watch for: uses_social_words_or_gestures

5. 5

   Last thing -- during this whole tea party, has your child shown any affection? Hugging the stuffed animal, patting you, wanting to sit close, feeding you or the bear? I'm curious about the warm fuzzy moments.

   Watch for: shows_affection_during_social_play

What this develops

• ◆Milestone
  Joint Attention

  Thinkingprimary

Visual example