3.3y–5y12 minFamily timeQuiet timeSocial play
Different Help, Same Belonging
A calm, practical conversation routine where you helps your child understand why some children need extra support or feel upset by certain things—building empathy, respectful language, and helpful responses.
What you'll need
Essentials
- 2–3 soft toys/dolls (or simple stick-figure drawings on paper)
- paper and a pencil/crayon
Nice to have
- a small bag with a couple of items inside (to demonstrate 'heavy' vs 'help')
- a timer/phone for short turns (optional)
Movement level: low
What you'll do
The 4-step guide, with what to look for at each step, is for signed-in parents.
What this develops
- MilestoneVerbalizes empathyHeart· 4y–5y· core· Step 3
- MilestoneOffers comfortHeart· 3y–4.5y· stretch
- MilestoneComforts a distressed personHeart· 3y–4.5y· core· Step 3
- MilestoneUnderstands that own actions affect other people, for example, becomes upset or tries to comfort another child when they realise they have upset them.Heart· 3.3y–5y· core
- MilestoneUses talk to organise, sequence and clarify thinking, ideas, feelings and events.Mind· 3.3y–5y· stretch· Step 4
- MilestoneNames own feelingsHeart· 3y–4y· core· Step 4
- MilestoneTalks about own interests and ideasMind· 4y–5y· core· Steps 2, 4
Where it comes from
- Source
- Development Matters in the EYFS (DfE, 2012)
- Original guidance
- “Explain carefully why some children may need extra help or support for some things, or why some children feel upset by a particular thing.”
- License
- Open Government Licence v3.0
- Attribution
- © Crown Copyright 2012 (Development Matters in the EYFS, DfE)